FAQS! FACTS! FAX! 179 (16/09/99)

POP UP MAIL

In response to your question regarding a more interesting notification of a new e-mail (F!F!F! September 3), I use 'The Bat!' as my email client. When a new email arrives it plays a sound, and scrolls a message across the top of the screen showing who it is from and the subject. It is available as shareware from: www.ritlabs.com
Graham Trevor

I haven't tried them myself but there appears to be a promising selection of popup email messages at:
http://www.downloadplanet.net/files/

Freeware/E-mail/Checkers/index.shtml

David Finch

With reference to the letter asking why movie PC screens always flash up
"You have mail ", this is not the only odd characteristic of Hollywood computers:

You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.

All monitors display two-inch-high letters.

High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces.

Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.

Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.

Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The really advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen.

A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.

Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in less than three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability.

Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time videophone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY-MP.

With thanks to humour net: humour-net-subscribe@entrenet.com

Mark Pearce

A

Thanks to everyone who wrote in with suggestion for alternative e-mail client software, adding sound notification to incoming email messages, and observations on PCs in the movies. However, we're still looking for a really eye-catching 'you've got mail' animation -- like they have in the movies -- specifically for Outlook Express, if anyone knows of one please get in touch. 

IN A FLAP

How do I stop envelope flaps from sticking up when I run them through a laser printer? I have tried different types, including putting the flap inside the envelope but they still stick! Is there is a special type of envelope for laser printers? Does anyone want to buy a box of 1,000 envelopes? They work great in an ink jet printer!
Mike Wesson

A

Good question, any suggestions?

WEB OF POWER

I believe there is a web site, which provides up to date tariff information for the many gas and electricity suppliers available in a given UK location; I would be grateful for the contact information for such a site.

John Murfin

A

Buy. Co's website features useful on-line Electricity and Gas tariff calculators. Just key in details of your current supplier and roughly how much you spend a year on utilities and it will check to see if there are any cheaper alternatives. You can find the calculator at: http://www.buy.co.uk/personal/

Calculators/electricity.asp

HOT METAL

I have an old office computer, which was upgraded having a new hard drive and new CD-ROM drive fitted. It works perfectly but for one thing. After I have been using it for about one hour a bleeping sound starts. I think it may be overheating but moving it to cooler places does not seem to work. To get rid of the sound I have to turn the computer off each time and wait for half an hour before I can use it again. Please help as I have to write long essays on it and it takes forever!

Mark Roper

A

It certainly sounds like a thermal problem. It could be that adding the CD-ROM Drive and new hard disc drive has put a strain on the PCs power supply, causing it to overheat; though that wouldn't explain the 'bleeping ' sound. It's more likely that the CPU is running hot. Virtually all Pentium PCs and many 486 models have small cooling fans and finned metal heat sinks mounted on the microprocessor chip. These fans can and do fail – sometimes quite noisily -- allowing the chip to overheat. It could be that the fan wasn't re-connected or the wiring was disturbed when the new drives were fitted. The only way to check is to remove the lid and see if the fan is running when the PC is switched on.  They're not expensive (£5 to £10) and normally quite easy to replace – most just clip on – but if you don't feel up to the job, or the fan is working then the machine will need to be looked at by an engineer.

HP SOURCE?

I cannot get my HP500C DeskJet to work with Windows 95. It worked perfectly well on Windows 3.1 before I upgraded. I know the driver required is different and numerous 'advisors' have told me to download a driver, but I don't think one exists for the above configuration. Incidentally all that currently happens is a line of smiling faces (is someone taking the Mickey.) on the first page. On the second page the printer overprints a single line till I switch the beast off! It will produce the three test pages perfectly!
Tony Wood

A

You shouldn't need to download any new software the necessary driver for the HP500C is included with Windows 95. Try removing all of the printers installed on your machine and start again. Open the Printers folder in My Computer, click on each printer icon in turn and press delete. When they've all gone double click on Add New Printer to run the installation Wizard, make sure you specify the correct make and model when the manufacturer's list appears. 

WAYWARD WORD

My Word 97 is now taking 10 seconds to close a file. I have defragged the
disk and I have only used about a fifth of it. Do you have any advice
please?

Bob Henry

A

This sounds like the handiwork of our old friend automatic journal entry recording in MS Outlook. Go to the Tools menu in Outlook and select Options then the Journal tab and clear all of the check boxes in the 'Also record files from' list.